Bullying in Youth; A Life Lost

Yesterday I had a newsfeed full of posts regarding local girl who had taken her life that day. Suicide hits home. I’ve known too many either personally or indirectly that have taken their own lives and even one is too many.

I clicked on the hashtag they had made up for the girl (I will not post it for respect for the family). The reason – I can’t tell you why.  Every post that flashed through my newsfeed explained or alluded that she was the victim of bullying.  I came across one post, with the most disturbing things I have ever read. They were print screens of posts from her wall and conversations of open bullying posted right for anyone to see – complete with replies. People, presumably school peers, stating that she should stop talking about all these attempts and just be successful next time. Posts that were derogative, nasty and so very hard to believe.

DSC_7530I can not believe these words were written, by teens nonetheless. Who could be so cruel, how does one even think those things let alone write them? I would be devastated, angry and a whole slew of emotions if I had ever known my child had said such things. I am determined to make sure it never happens and I hope you are too. I want to raise my child to be himself no matter what way the crowd is going. If the group is picking on this person, I want him to be the one to lend a hand to help. I want him to be the friend that reaches out. I want him to use his voice. Be confident. Know right from wrong.

We all have a responsibility as parents to give our kids the tools to be successful in life. This includes learning to be a good friend. Being responsible for our actions. Understanding the importance of what we do, say and how we act. To be open with us about things happening at school – to establish communication and a relationship where they feel comfortable telling us anything. None of this is easy, but we need to do our best to mold them into the best they can be.

This particular loss has bothered me all day. I definitely think it was seeing what people had actually posted. If they are able to write those words, how was she treated in person? There are two sides to eveIMG_20140223_140553ry story, one which has ended, and the remaining lives with proof through statements on a public wall. The life lost might not have been innocent of such statements herself, I can not attest, but one thing is clear – these statements are UNACCEPTABLE by anyone of any age. I encourage you to please sit with your children and have an age appropriate discussion with your children about how much words can really hurt. Sticks and stones will break your bones, and words CAN really hurt someone. The earlier they learn this and the more it is continuously emphasized, the higher the chance it will stick for life.


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  • Thank you for what you said, about the negativity that was still brought upon even after the death of her. I was a close friend of hers, and I was one of the people who got nasty things said towards me about my friend. I was totally mind blown that these people could have thought such things even after we had lost her to because of what people were saying in the first place. This world is cruel and nasty, and we need to start teaching our kids what the consequences may be when you say nasty things towards another person. I was only told that be a bullying would hurt someone’s feelings, I was never taught the consequences. And I’m sure other kids in my generation were taught the same thing, that’s why so many of them don’t watch what they say. Bullying needs to stop!

    • I am very sorry for your loss. Suicide is an awful thing for everyone. You will have some tough days ahead and many unanswered questions. I first experienced the loss of a friend to suicide at age 16 and it leaves a lot of sadness, confusion and heartbreak. Take care of yourself in the coming weeks and be that voice that stands up against bullying. It does need to stop.

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